xp_bevatron | Oh mon dieu.

Oh mon dieu.

I have taken over Marie-Ange and Amanda's apartment. With alcohol. Because somewhere on the internet, I found the 'national costume' portion of the Miss Universe pageant.

Adrienne, you should come over. Quickly.

As a sample...

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Oh, continue scrolling, cousin. It gets worse. So very much worse.

http://i54.tinypic.com/fyzkhh.jpg

I am blaming Manuel for this. I am calling him right now to tell him to make it go away. I am serious!

Amanda! Come see your country's entry! I can hear you on your mobile!

There is seriously not enough booze in the world for this.

Why does our national costume look like a spilt attacked a swimsuit?

Edited 2011-09-10 01:40 (UTC)

I brought as much alcohol as the store was allowed to sell me...

Perhaps Adrienne can bring more?

And by split I meant doily. Fuck you autocorrect.

More booze. I dint care how. I'll be on the fire escape poisoning my lungs.

What, has my cousin gotten you to not smoke in your own apartment? Feh. I may join you for one in a bit, if you do not mind the company?

Why is everything my fault?

Because it amuses me to blame you for everything?

My choice, not hers. This is her home too, and it's just as easy for me to smoke outside.

Join me if you like; I may disappear when I'm done. Literally.

Eh, I simply enjoy needling my cousin, to be honest.

I apologize if my coming over made you uncomfortable. It is your home, after all.

Don't be a dope, 's fine. I just have a limit to how many ruffles I can handle. Have fun family bonding time. ;)

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how the fuck does doily become split? that is the craziest fucking autocorrect in the history of anyhting ever.

Also i have alcohol. you can worship me now!

Adrienne has more! Everyone worship Adrienne!

-sent from my mobile device

Unfortunately, you are neither my nor my cousin's type. Besides, my cousin's boyfriend is here with us.

What? What the fukc? Why is worshipping meaning have sex with? Where the fuck is your mind? Christ! I meant worship, as in fall at my feet proclaiming me a goddess, there was no sex involved! The fuck?!!!!!!!!!!!!!?????/

-sent from my mobile device

Oh. The phrase is 'my bad', correct? I was equating 'worship' with oral sex.

Clearly I need to get laid more.

Wow, you totally do.

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http://i55.tinypic.com/33mmwwz.jpg

Is she ... wearing a hat that is a boat?

...and carrying what would appear to be le sacre coeur on a pillow?

That does not trump a hatboat.

And yet it appears quite tame as headwear goes.

Witness, for example, Miss Nigeria: http://i55.tinypic.com/2eqggh0.jpg

Are we certain she is not wearing it back to front? Because if it were turned around it would only be 90% as awful as it is now.

I am not sure.

But I believe Miss Peru came equipped for the 'ritual beheading' portion of the competition...

http://i54.tinypic.com/2ikpf8y.jpg

http://i54.tinypic.com/21eymfp.jpg

Miss Mexico has the severed and skinned head as part of her outfit

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